Richard King Perkins II
How Twin Peaks Almost Killed Me
I was not working by choice,
eating two slices of sausage pizza a day,
Somehow, I held on to enough money
from my unemployment check
to buy some Twin Peaks merchandise
from a mail-order catalog
not long after the series had been canceled.
A few weeks later
the post office left a note
telling me to come pick-up my stuff.
Walking back from the post office,
I was lost in my petty gluttony
and forgot that my route took me past
the four thousand student high school
just as the kids were getting out.
Two girls walked down the eroded sidewalk
in front of me,
but looked back in alarm through me
at a slowly driving conversion van.
The girls hit the ground when they saw the gun
come up to the window.
I just stood there and tried to become invisible.
What could have been the last scene of my life
must have been directed by Frank Capra
and not David Lynch,
because a police cruiser drove past at that moment.
The van pulled away without ever firing a shot.
I helped the girls to their feet and we shared
the worst sort of smile
humans can ever share.
I wanted to write the editor
and tell her
The desirable symmetry
of your features
is a rarity among humans
but it seemed kind of creepy
so I didn’t.
It’s taken me a long time
to learn about restraint
and knowing when I have to be prudent
even when I’m being completely earnest.
it wasn’t like I was going to tell her something
she didn’t already know.
About the author:
Richard King Perkins II is a state-sponsored advocate for residents in long-term care facilities. He lives in Crystal Lake, IL with his wife, Vickie and daughter, Sage. He is a three-time Pushcart nominee and a Best of the Net nominee. Writing for six years, his work has appeared in more than a thousand publications including The Louisiana Review, Bluestem, Emrys Journal, Sierra Nevada Review, Roanoke Review, The Red Cedar Review and Crannog. He has poems forthcoming in The William and Mary Review, Sugar House Review, Plainsongs, Free State Review and Milkfist. He was a recent finalist in The Blue Bonnet Review Spring Poetry, The Rash Awards, Sharkpack Alchemy, Writer’s Digest and Bacopa Literary Review poetry contests.